Discussion Blog
Latest Discussion Blog Post
How Are You? No, Really?
Many of us in caregiving roles forget to ask that question of ourselves.
Discussion Blog Posts
I Want to Be a Helpful Influence but I’m Too Depressed
Our member blueskies is exhausted and depressed. Disappointment and crushed expectations are taking a toll. We take our hats off to you, our members, ready to use your last reserves of energy to help your Loved Ones. But please, take a few precautions…
Is This Early Recovery Instability or Is He Headed for Relapse?
“He’s doing worse and worse. He’s hiding away in his room. He’s headed for a relapse.” Early recovery does not always look promising. They're wobbly and shaky on their new feet. It’s not linear. It’s certainly not easy. But they may still be moving forward.
You Can Make Friends with Enabling
Can you relate to this mom? Stuck at home with a Loved One yoyo-ing back and forth from opiod use to withdrawals, saying he wants treatment but then not following up. His anger and outbursts seem to dominate the atmosphere and yet – he's a young adult and they wonder if he should still have certain privileges like access to the car. Here's an invitation to rethink the sticky, tricky question of Enabling.
I Can’t Tell If He Is Using or Not
Does your Loved One live far away from you? Is it hard to tell when they've been using or not? In this article, family advocate and beloved Allies in Recovery contributor Laurie MacDougall breaks down how to be CRAFTy when distance is an issue.
Recovery Is A Bumpy Road
Your Loved One was doing better than ever before. With the lockdown and without sufficient recovery input, they were thrown off course. Dominique Simon-Levine says that the danger of a relapse is a reality but that what was learned can’t be unlearned.
How Hard Should He Fall?
Is danger a regular part of your dance with your Loved One? Do you find it hard to know when to step in and when to let them find their own solution? Here Dominique Simon-Levine highlights one member's situation and points to the light she can follow.
I Don’t Want to Have Compassion for Him Right Now
Blueskies watched her husband drinking more and more for decades. Then he got treatment and got sober. Now he's drinking again. So many ups and downs — it's so exhausting and disheartening. She wonders, is it OK to retreat a little right now? Is she allowed to wallow a bit?
Is He Too Young to Be Considered Addicted?
Is your Loved One just experimenting or could you be witnessing the early stages of addiction? Regardless of the severity of your Loved One’s use, when their behavior has become worrisome, it is time to get CRAFTy.
We’re Visiting Him Soon – How Can I Address His Denial?
When you have to travel across the country to visit your Loved One, only to see them wasting their lives on drug and alcohol, it can feel like a helpless situation. Dominique Simon-Levine writes here about how make the most of the opportunities in front of you.
I’m Trying to Let Go of the Last 15 Years
Has your Loved One been struggling for what feels like forever? Do you feel like you have tried everything or maybe even done too much? Read here about how CRAFT can provide you a fresh perspective when you don’t know what to do anymore.
I Don’t Know What’s Right Anymore
An Allies member wonders if she can even go on, reeling from the constant stream of destruction and drama in her Loved One's life. She doesn't even know what to believe any more. Here we offer direction for when you simply cannot see your way through.
He Ransacks the House for the Drugs I Confiscated
If a family member has confiscated a Loved One's stash, is it ever appropriate to dole it out in small amounts in order to prevent them from further risks? Read Dominique Simon-Levine's thoughtful and well-informed response to this extremely challenging question.
When the Wish Came, I Didn’t See It
She's receiving texts from her significant other but she suspects he's intoxicated when sending them. Looking back, she fears she missed a 'wish' and the opportunity to jump in with treatment options. How can we apply CRAFT when communication is distorted?
Their Influence Is Ruining My Efforts
Our member’s loved one was supposed to come home but is now back on the streets. In the wake of this major setback, our member questions the influence of her daughter’s boyfriend and his family. Read here to learn how to be CRAFTy when there's a third party that could be impairing your Loved One’s recovery.
I Cherish Every Atom of Her Being
When our Loved Ones are spiraling downward and cutting us off more and more, we suffer, we are so afraid, and sad. What does CRAFT suggest for the family member in times like these? Even in such a seemingly hopeless situation, you still have several action items…
He’s so Agitated, how can I Help?
While a Loved One tries to navigate life at home without using, he's grown increasingly snappy and impatient. Dominique Simon-Levine shines a light on the best approach for holding one's ground during this tense time.
We Need to Find the Middle Ground
This family needs help practicing CRAFT with their Loved One. He's been in and out of treatment for years, and not everyone is in agreement about the best approach. Here we chart a course to help get everyone on the same page.
Is He Really in Recovery?
A member poses an interesting question: if a Loved One is on MAT and occasionally slips up, can this be considered recovery? Dominique Simon-Levine weighs in with an important discussion of recovery activities and the bigger picture.
The Power of Language
Laurie MacDougall discusses the dramatic impact that language has on our discussions of Substance Use Disorder. Let's work together to reduce stigma, improve access to treatment, and embrace a more humane approach to our Loved Ones' struggles – all with the words we choose.
We Don’t Want to Enable His Use
A member wants to keep communications open but is concerned that her Loved One only connects with them on his terms. Dominique Simon-Levine lays out the CRAFT approach to help this family break their unproductive cycles.