Discussion Blog
Latest Discussion Blog Post
Cutting Him Off Entirely Isn’t the Answer—Is It?
We’ve all heard the argument: cut the cord. Let them sink to rock bottom. They’ve made their bed; now they have to lie in it. Recently, Allies member erinlewis was offered this sort of advice concerning her teenage son. Data and experience have shown that such an approach is usually the wrong one for our Loved Ones—but maintaining a connection doesn’t mean that anything goes. Laurie MacDougall walks us through a CRAFT-informed approach to self-care, boundaries, and the balancing act of connection and accountability.
Discussion Blog Posts
I’m All Out of Patience
help4t is all out of patience. The courts failed to enforce treatment for her Loved One. Her life is a real mess. Take a look at how Dominique Simon-Levine lays out an approach to help this family member stay on track.
He Relapsed, Now What?
123peace is reeling from her Loved One's recent relapse. It feels like her hopes for his recent trip to rehab have been dashed. Dominique Simon-Levine's counsel helps shed light on the path ahead.
Will He Ever See the Truth?
A member wonders if her Loved One will ever come to terms with what he's put the family through. Read Annie Highwater's inspiring response which offers strength and grounding we can all use during difficult times.
We’ve Closed the Family Bank
GingerY has told her Loved One "no more cash," but now it seems like she never hears from him. Read on for a CRAFT approach in navigating this new territory.
She’ll Need More Help After Jail
While her Loved One is in jail, she's saying a lot of the right things… But once she's out this family member knows she will need more help. See how a CRAFT approach can help guide the way.
We Thought We Had Lost Her, but CRAFT Worked
This family member had given up on ever getting her Loved One back again… her powerful tale of hope credits CRAFT with helping turn things around. We are so grateful for her sharing this story with the Allies community.
She’s on Methadone but Still Using Meth
A Loved One has finally started treatment, but she has a long ways to go. The family member wonders, is she just doing this to get me off her back? Take a look at how Dominique Simon-Levine uses a CRAFT approach to work with this situation.
Loved One with Diabetes Goes to ER with Severe Withdrawals
1delapsia's Loved One landed in the ER, in the midst of full-blown withdrawals, narrowly escaping a diabetic coma. The doctors spelled out the situation in no uncertain terms: the addiction is the gravest threat to his health right now. See how to take a CRAFT approach in the aftermath of this scare.
Victories!
When you are feeling low and discouraged, perhaps you will find strength and encouragement in the experiences of other members who have used to CRAFT successfully with their Loved Ones. If they can, you can!
Member Poll – Let’s Talk About Frustration
Polling all members! Author and recovery enthusiast Annie Highwater is doing some research on the topic of frustration… Read her post and send in a comment. We look forward to hearing what you have to say!
On The Topic Of Trust
We often find ourselves wondering how to repair the bonds that are broken when trust has been violated. In this thoughtful exploration of the topic of trust, Annie Highwater shares her insights about the repair process. You won't want to miss the gems of wisdom shared in this post!
He’s Stopped Drinking… Now He’s Smoking Pot
Back from detox – and a brush with death – a Loved One appears to have been "scared straight…" Now he's using pot daily and this family member wonders how to approach the use. Read on to see Dominique Simon-Levine's suggestions for approaching this topic.
My Little Brother Is Using Like I Used To
When all but one member of a family is in recovery and living a sober lifestyle, how do we approach this Loved One's use without being too overbearing? We've been through so much – how can we use CRAFT to help prevent him from going down the wrong path? See Dominique Simon-Levine's take on using CRAFT in this household.
Loved One On Methadone, Still Struggling With Other Drugs
A Loved One is on methadone, but has still been using crack and alcohol. He heard Adderall might help with the crack cravings, and is trying that now, but just getting it on the street – very expensive. Reeling from her LO's heavy drug use, spending, and possible repercussions of this use on his access to methadone, 123peace reaches out for guidance.
My Granddaughter Just Got Evicted
A family member sees her Loved One in a lot of trouble. She struggles with mental health issues as well as addiction. She just got evicted and needs help fast. Dominique Simon-Levine shares her persepctive on how to proceed in this difficult situation.
She’s Coming Home and I Need Help
A family member faces concerns about her Loved One coming home after a residential program. How can we use CRAFT when a Loved One has been sober, in treatment, but is still on shaky ground? Dominique Simon-Levine shares a CRAFT approach for this fragile time of transition.
He’s Not Adhering to Our Contract
Frustrated that her Loved One is back home but not holding up his end of the bargain, a family member writes in for help. What do we do when a Loved One is so close to seeking treatment but doesn't follow through? Dominique Simon-Levine lays out an approach for this family member to consider.
This is MY Home!
A family member struggles with her Loved One's reaction to being locked out after curfew. Eventually, there will come a time when he can no longer enjoy the comforts of home. Take a look at a CRAFT perspective on this transition.
She’s Trying to Moderate Use on Her Own But I Don’t See it Working
An Allies member has trouble knowing when to engage/ disengage. He lives with his Loved One, who is trying to moderate on her own, but the strategy does not seem to be working. See how to voice your concerns using CRAFT principles in this situation.
Celebrating Positive Steps
Wins can come when you're least expecting them. Read an inspiring report of a member's recent success using CRAFT. Positive steps like these don't mean the problems are all gone, but they are hard-won and worth celebrating!