Discussion Blog
Latest Discussion Blog Post
What Do We Have to Look Forward To?
Supporting a Loved one with SUD means different things to different people. Meggie, for example, comes from a family that’s confronted the disorder through “tough love”—leaving the Loved One to deal with their addiction entirely alone. This never felt right to Meggie, who wanted to fight alongside her husband for his recovery. When she discovered CRAFT, she soon realized it was designed to help her do just that. Nonetheless, thoughts of the future still leave her anxious. What if he’s in and out of jail for a long time to come? Isabel Cooney reminds us that so much depends on what we tell ourselves about both the present and the possible future.
Discussion Blog Posts
Drug Testing at Home? Some Things to Consider…
Laurie MacDougall responds to a member to explain what she and her husband did when they let their son move back home to work on his recovery. They created a structure of boundaries that he had to abide by in order to live in our house…
Incentives vs. Bribes – Part 2
In this follow-up to her post on incentives, bribes and reinforcing, Laurie MacDougall shares her "One and Done" approach. Read on for a practical and strategic approach to use with your Loved One, and look out for her "Buyer Beware" caveat!
I’m Back To The Drawing Board
A Loved One seems to have one foot in the door with recovery activities, and the other foot stuck in the old using lifestyle. Dominique Simon-Levine's counsel highlights what to focus on in this difficult time of transition.
He’s Asked Us To Pay For His Car…
A member has already agreed to cover her Loved One's sober housing, but now he wants help with car and insurance too, and money is tight. Should his parents do everything they possibly can to support him in sober living, or can the car come later?
Should He Move In With Me?
A member faces a tough decision. A plan to move in together would have her Loved One moving abroad to live with her… but she'd be his only support and he's still in early sobriety. Dominique Simon-Levine weighs in with an approach to protect both of them.
Where Do We Draw The Line?
A young woman has relapsed after 1.5 years of abstinence, but her parents don't think the substance use is the issue. When it comes time to sit down with her, what boundaries would be helpful to set? Dominique Simon-Levine offers counsel for laying out a solid plan.
Our Conversations Are So Frustrating
lucyzara has been meeting for breakfast with her Loved One but they keep arguing about his use. Should she stop meeting with him? Dominique Simon-Levine shows how a CRAFT approach can help…
I Want to Handle Vacation Differently This Time
Her husband's problem drinking usually gets worse on holidays. This time, she wants to avoid getting angry but their small condo might make that challenging. We've suggested some ways to implement CRAFT away from home.
Is He Sabotaging His Recent Success?
mandybrownaz's Loved One has a promising job lead, and is showing hopeful signs here and there. But he still has periods of use – why do Loved Ones sabatoge themselves when they start to succeed in the real world? Dominique Simon-Levine shares her insights.
He’s Out of Jail and Drinking Again
katie1chad 's Loved One is just out of jail, but his plans to turn things around may have evaporated. She wants to help but communications are touch and go. Dominique Simon-Levine frames an approach to keep things moving forward while maintaining peace of mind.
He’s Rewriting Our Past, It’s Delusional
Couples go through a profound change when one of them stops using drugs and alcohol. The family has waited for so long, has lived through so much craziness and fear, frustration and anger, and it is such a relief when they finally stop, that you expect everything going forward to finally let up.
Must I Accept this Backslide?
Fireweed3's daughter is hanging on to recovery by her fingernails. Mom would like to "uninvite" the (using) boyfriend from visiting/staying. What if we flip the solution on its head…what if we see the boyfriend as the reward? Also… what does it mean when an opiate user is smoking pot all day?
Diabetes With Multiple Addictions
1delapisa's Loved One struggles with severe addictions, Type 1 Diabetes and mental illness. He needs substantial support but refuses to discuss it. Dominique Simon-Levine charts a path towards safer ground… And we're putting a call out to members who have experience with longer-term care options when a Loved One also has serious medical conditions.
TV Can Be A Tricky Reward
Settling on appropriate rewards can be quite a challenge. Dominique Simon-Levine explains how to think clearly about rewards so that they are palatable for the whole famiy.
Drama
Addiction and Drama seem to go hand in hand. Here Annie Highwater shares a refreshing approach to avoid engaging with the drama – helping us save our energy for more important things!
The Argument For MAT
When we talk about Medication Assisted Treatment (MAT), many questions tend to come up. Read here for Dominique Simon-Levine's thoughtful and well-researched answers to MAT related questions.
I’m Working On My Own Recovery
AB123 is facing some hard truths as she looks back on the past ten years. Her Loved One is finally sober, but he has yet to acknowledge what he put the family through. Dominique Simon-Levine offers sage advice on what to expect at this point in a Loved One's recovery.
I Need Help With Her Living Situation
With trauma in her past, finding safe living options for a Loved One is a challenge. Dominique Simon-Levine lays out a plan and asks the membership: Do others on the site have suggestions for female residential care that is trauma-focused?
His Rehab Didn’t Allow Suboxone
A Loved One has had long stretches of sobriety, but during relapses he has faced enormous challenges getting help. Dominique Simon-Levine details the top considerations for helping him as he leaves rehab.
Where Can He Go After Rehab?
A Loved One will be finishing rehab soon but coming back home is not ideal… He can be angry and hard to be around. Here Dominique Simon-Levine discusses how you can keep your home your own without turning your back on your Loved One.