These parents are reeling in the wake of realizing their teenaged daughter is experimenting with all sorts of substances. It feels tempting to monitor/control her use somehow. And what about messaging her (using) friends? Is this a bad move?
A member wonders if her son will ever come to terms with what he’s put the family through. Read Annie Highwater’s inspiring response which offers strength and grounding we can all use during difficult times.
This mom received a harsh note about her work performance on the eve of her holiday break. Her loved one’s addiction has consumed so much of her energy and time that she hasn’t been able to devote as much attention to her work as she’s used to. Unable to share any of this with her boss, she feels anxiety and shame about his poorly timed message.
If, as family members, we wait around for a 100% commitment from our loved one, we will almost certainly be waiting a long time. Family members must make decisions and take actions in an environment of probabilities.
Five weeks after changing the lock and having her son leave the house, she received a text from him. He expresses discontent with where his life is and feelings hopelessness. This is the equivalent of what CRAFT calls a “dip”. Here’s what to do when you’re lucky enough to be present for a “dip”.
Mom spent years helping her daughter and son-in-law as they sank deeper and deeper into trouble with the drugs and probably also alcohol. She now realizes that her helping them was probably enabling. Now her daughter has essentially cut her off and Mom needs to detach.
Acceptance of a painful reality is a process and takes time. If it’s happening to you, be open to the truth and gentle with yourself. If it’s happening to someone you know, tread lightly and with compassion.
She has successfully used CRAFT taught on our member site to help her son into treatment for heroin addiction. He is now 9 months out and has not relapsed…but he is at home, and mom worries about his pot use and fleeting motivation, despite his continued visits to a therapist.
With her daughter now on the street, this mother wonders what she can do to reach her. To further complicate things, she has a manipulative boyfriend.
Is CRAFT always the right approach? Even when your loved one has been so deceptive and unwilling to listen?
Her daughter sleeps all day and uses at night. Is home becoming a place which enables her daughter’s use? Should she kick her out? What does CRAFT say about home as a reward?
An aunt has been instrumental in helping her two nephews engage into treatment. Their recovery remains strong yet she worries that their mother’s recent overdoses may destabilize them.
They discharged him from detox precisely when withdrawal was at its worst. He will need the full support of his family to get through this difficult time.
For some individuals, medication can be an important complementary aid in recovery. At Allies in Recovery, we have no wish to stigmatize a treatment plan that includes medication. But here’s what we believe is of equal importance for helping a Loved One who struggles with addiction…
Fentanyl hijacks our ability to find pleasure elsewhere in life, and the withdrawals are so agonizing that we’ll do absolutely anything to avoid them. How do you win the battle?
The period of early recovery is fragile, even dangerous. As important as it is to remove the drugs, it is even more important to add things in that take the place of the drugs, providing meaning, guidance, and supporting recovery and health…
They’ve always opened their home to him when he’s trying to get clean but he has now started taking advantage of his parents. He is getting high in their house, stealing from them, enjoying a warm bed and food while using. He’s not really interested in going into treatment. He knows what he needs to say to get through the door.
A son in early recovery would like his car back but his mother worries that this may trigger a relapse. She wants to help him but is worn out and worried. She has seen his early sobriety before and feels he is less motivated this time.
He’s just out of treatment for heroin addiction and now at home smoking pot. His mother is very worried and unsure how to react. Should she let it slide and just focus on his recovery from heroin addiction? Or are there small steps she can take to try to reduce the pot smoking?
For some addicted individuals, medication can be an important complementary aid in recovery. At Allies in Recovery, we have no wish to stigmatize a treatment plan that includes medication.