Did I Do CRAFT Wrong and Trigger Him to Drink?

She thought her husband was drinking, so she left. He called and said he wasn’t drinking, so she came home, but by then he’d gone out and he did drink. This wife feels she inadvertently triggered her husband to go drink. Did she? She also feels like she messed everything up with one episode of removing rewards. Did she really? The CRAFT approach has us “remove rewards,” including removing ourselves, when our loved one is using substances. CRAFT also asks you to make numerous split-second decisions every day. You’re going to get it wrong sometimes.  In the post below, we walk through this scenario with some CRAFT ABC’s.

3 Months into Recovery and He Doesn’t Show an Ounce of Gratitude

This mom has been able to successfully use CRAFT principles to shepherd her son into treatment and to support him during early recovery. However, her son’s lack of gratitude is beginning to feel unbearable. AlliesinRecovery.net Director Dominique Simon-Levine weighs in with a reminder to practice communications skills, and to take care of yourself – all part of the CRAFT curriculum at Allies.

He May Be Spending the Holidays in Jail. Should I Bail Him Out?

Anger and resentment towards her loved one has transformed – with one event – into love and fear. He was arrested out of state for dealing drugs and driving under the influence. The family has confirmation that he has indeed been using meth again. Now, the holiday together is in question, and she wonders how much to share with the family. The CRAFT approach suggests “removing rewards” and “allowing natural consequences.” Read on to see our view that the arrest might end up helping the situation and getting him to treatment.

Is This Early Recovery Instability or Is He Headed for Relapse?

An AlliesinRecovery.net member is concerned her son might relapse at home after responding well to treatment. Not seeing any efforts on his part to go back to a healthy routine, she is getting resentful. She even wonders if she should ask him to move out. Dominique Simon-Levine has some CRAFT-informed suggestions for her to try first.

Inherited Trauma: A First-Hand Account

A moving essay from a young Filipinx writer reflects on how trauma reverberates across generations. Guiying Angel Zhong has always known she loves her mother—but that’s where the simple statements end. Their relationship has long been fraught with deeply-felt tensions and anxiety. The heart of Zhong’s short essay, however, is her eloquent understanding of the roots of such problems, including the special challenges faced by members of historically marginalized groups. In the end, her admiration and affection for her mother count for more than the long memory of pain.

My Loved One Also Struggles with Mental Health – Is CRAFT Right for Us?

One of our long-time Allies in Recovery members wrote in to our “Pose a Question” blog with an update on her loved one – her husband – who has given up harder substances but continues to struggle with alcohol and marijuana. Since our member first discovered CRAFT, her husband was diagnosed with serious mental illness. She wonders if CRAFT is a compatible approach to support his mental health issues.

9 CRAFT-y Guidelines to Break the Cycle of Addiction

An Allies member has her daughter living with her, which felt like a relief, at least at first. She had kicked her methamphetamine habit and completed detox and treatment. Now, they’ve slipped into a dance that doesn’t feel so great. She’s using less, but is substituting fentanyl for the methamphetamine. Mom sees that there’s a cycle that needs to be broken, but she wants to keep building on the positive aspects of their relationship. She’s also not sure if having her daughter at home is too enabling, but she promised to let her stay. 

Boundaries and Rewards: Tips on Using CRAFT

An Allies in Recovery member is encountering difficulties with removing rewards and holding boundaries. They’re asking their loved one to leave when he’s drinking, but he simply refuses! In this post, we offer a little refresher on rewards – when to use them, and what kinds – as part of the Community Reinforcement and Family Training (CRAFT) approach that we teach you on our website.