All right, we know: you’re not usually logging into Allies in Recovery for a laugh. But this one just (sorry) hits the spot.
We should all remember: not everything that ails us is a mystery.
“A Change Is Gonna Come” hasn’t sounded this transcendent since the Sam Cooke original. Truly.
Tom Jones’ musical evocation of what it means to be there for a Loved One.
Need a break from all the hard questions? Ronnie the donkey’s got you covered.
We’re not going to tell you it’s easy. But some approaches are far more likely to succeed than others.
A new official video reintroduces this classic, whose message has never been more poignant. Not to be missed.
The full name of the song is “Ndikhokhele Bawo,” which means “Lead me, Father” in Xhosa. These South African youths, assembled in their school’s courtyard, transform their place of learning into a concert hall with nothing more than the power of their voices. But it’s their spirit of joy and solidarity that lifts the beautiful into the realm of the sublime.
Forty percent of Americans will suffer a major depressive episode at some point in their lives. Five percent of the world’s population is suffering from it at any given time. It’s a disease that’s too often misunderstood—when it’s not overlooked entirely. Recovery writer Annie Highwater offers this primer on the many forms depression can take, and the variety of paths available for dealing with it.
The Dallas-based quartet often focuses on spiritual and gospel music, and like any truly gifted performers, they make even the most familiar classics sound and feel brand new. This time, they’ve chosen a song that never gets old, and one with a special resonance for many in our Allies community.
“Most of the world’s problems arise from a misunderstanding about parts and burdens,” Dr. Richard Schwartz asserts. In IFS, which he founded, the “parts” are our multiple internal selves, and the burdens are the trauma and wounds they try to manage on our behalf. The simple but radical proposition of IFS is that these multiple selves arise for good reasons and have a lot to offer—if we can help them change with the seasons of our lives.
Our sanctuary blog is often a place where you’ll find light, comfort, and tales of perseverance in the face of immense challenges. Today is no exception—but a warning: all of those familiar qualities are accompanied by one of the more vivid portraits of suffering we’ve shared with you.
You don’t need anyone to tell you that loneliness sucks. But did you know that it’s an all-but-out-of-control epidemic in the modern world, and that lives are shortened because of it? That’s the lamentable truth. But happily, as Dr. Jill Carnahan relates, the remedy is accessible to nearly everyone.
They’re not a secret, and despite their 18th-century style uniforms, they’re not part of any military. But the discipline and focus of these 25 young men from Switzerland could put many an army marching band to shame.
No studio, no mixers, no lights, no amplifiers: when Cover Story Doo-Wop sings “Stand By Me” under the Bethesda Terrace arches in New York’s Central Park, it’s their talent and deep feeling that carry us away.
A work of A work of artistic genius can feel immune to the passage of years. But for works meant to be performed, “timeless” does not Mean “static.” This stairwell recording of Schubert’s “Ave Maria,” by four gifted young Texans, imbues new life and grace into a song loved round the world.
Across four decades of work on issues of trauma, addiction, childhood development, stress, and illness, Dr. Gabor Maté has become an internationally recognized thinker, author, and public speaker. But his brilliance is only one side of the coin. The other side, evident in all his remarks, is profound compassion. In this TED talk, both qualities are on full display.
The research has taken three quarters of a century (and counting). But the findings are truly remarkable: pain and pleasure are naturally balanced in a healthy brain. Substances can drastically disrupt that balance, however. In the effort to restore it, our brains go into overdrive. Fortunately, we can help it along—and help ourselves at the same time.
ChatGPT is not a living mind, let alone a therapist. It is, however, proving to be an immensely useful online assistant for people across the world. Little wonder that professionals and others are finding ways to apply its powers of information gathering and synthesis to the challenge of living with depression. This article offers one emotion expert’s tips on how ChatGPT and related technology might be able to shoulder a bit of that burden.
More than one quarter of U.S. adults report having been diagnosed with depression at some point in their lives. The disease makes life challenging in all kinds of ways, and relationships are no exception. For partners of those suffering depression, the inability to “fix” the other’s condition can be difficult and frustrating. But even though we can’t cure our partners’ depression, we can learn skills that strengthen our relationships and make them more fulfilling for both parties.
With “If It Be Your Will,” Leonard Cohen wrote a modern psalm. With her 2006 recording at the Sydney Opera House, Anohni flings open the doors on the song’s deep longing for grace.
Think you know what a Coldplay song sounds like? Think again. But the re-imagining of the song is just one of the surprises in store when you watch this moment from America’s Got Talent 2023.
Many of us know it from our own experience. Now there’s science to back it up: time in nature brings a host of benefits for our bodies, minds, and emotional wellbeing. This article from UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Magazine provides an overview of the latest research. Spoiler: it’s all good news.
It was a gift of General Potemkin to Catherine the Great; it was a challenge for one of the great inventors of 18th-century England. It remains an extraordinary, and entirely functional, work of art.
Comedian DJ Pryor says that he’s always spoken to his children (even when they were toddlers) as if they could understand his every word. The approach seems to be working with 15-month-old Kingston, who holds detailed conversations with his dad. Sure, it’s in a language known only to the two of them, but that hasn’t stopped the world from being charmed.
A father & kids music group sings the pop classic in a way you’ve never heard before.
Intentional breathing practices have been around for millennia, but Western medicine has taken notice of their potential benefits only recently. This great primer on breath work covers the numerous ways it can improve wellbeing and reduce stress and anxiety. It also shows you some easy, no-fault ways to get started.
We all know, in theory, that calm and soothing music can reduce our stress and anxiety. How often do we give it the chance, though? On this website, gentle piano combines with some of the most stunning nature video you could hope for.
“To call yourself an alcoholic or a drug addict is a badge of honor,” the actress says. Jamie Lee Curtis is one of Hollywood’s most well-known actresses, but for years she kept her struggle with opioid use a secret. In this brief but extremely candid interview, she describes her journey from heavy use to recovery, and the turning points that she credits with saving her life.
Sam Fowler and her parents spent many years hiding her brother’s substance use disorder (SUD) from the world. The experience convinced Sam that openness, and even vulnerability, are better choices.
“You can do this, you can do this. Just one more fight.” Northern Irish singer Kaz Hawkins had lived a long time with abuse when her then-partner slit her throat and left her for dead. “Lipstick and Cocaine,” the song she wrote in the aftermath of the incident, pulls no punches. And that makes the tale of survival and recovery it sketches all the more powering.
“Don’t walk through the world looking for evidence that you don’t belong, because you’ll always find it.” Professor Brené Brown delivers a powerful statement about the nature of courage, and how it can’t exist without an embrace of uncertainty and vulnerability. At the same time, she makes a passionate case for self-affirmation. Her message is one of challenge, promise, and hope.
Few practices are better suited than yoga to help with both anxiety and stress. A gentle and compassionate round of yoga with Adriene Mishler, focused on the health, relaxation, and well-being of body, mind and spirit.
Have you ever considered it’s NOT about you? Actor, public speaker, and soccer coach Frederik Imbo offers strategies for escaping the suffering involved in taking offense.
15-year-old Jemima sings a tribute and lament for her mother on stage in Germany, and blows the roof off the place! Amazing young talent!
Thomas—that’s all we know of him, thanks to the blind audition rules on France’s talent show The Voice—stands up alone and delivers a “Sounds of Silence” to reckon with. Like every great performance, it’s a welding together of raw talent, respect for the material, and heart.
The late Buddhist teacher and peace activist reminds us that “the way out is in.”
Physician Gabor Maté tells us that the more we comprehend this thing we call stress, the less we need to be its victim.
Skills for self-care are more important than ever. In this essay, life coach and author Brad Stulberg offers five great coping strategies.
Gabor Maté, M.D., discusses addiction, stress, and how to seek and honor your own truth.
Hearing these virtuoso Cuban musicians would be enough to brighten anyone’s day. But here, they’re joined by peers in Mali, Japan, Lebanon, and Brazil, in a flawless rendition of a classic.
A stocking-sized collection of thoughts on compassion and self-care to help us close out the year.
Millions have heard Coldplay in stadiums around the world, but seriously, have they ever sounded better? Not a bad lunch break. Not a bad way to beat the winter blues.
In this intimate, mostly acoustic performance, the 24-year-old sensation leans deeper than ever into the Latin traditions that always inform her music.
William Prince writes music that evokes both a somber awareness of how we travel from loss to loss and a deep, pensive joy in being alive.
Sometimes when things get really tough, the fates send a messenger like Jon Batiste to remind us that the world’s full of light.
Trauma is not a competition—you can’t label one person’s experience as meaningful and another’s less so—but we can all agree that the trauma of war is something we’d not wish on any living soul.
American singer, songwriter, musician, and actor, Prince, performing live – Play that funky Music – Hollywood Swinging – Fantastic Voyage 4/28/11
This isn’t just feel-good music (although it does feel good!). You’ll also hear so much wisdom, memory of trauma, and moral conviction in the infectious beats and the wonder of Common’s freestyle.
Shirley Serban has released yet another comical adaptation of a top 40 hit, this time aimed at our beloved males. The forecast may be grim, but the outlook is sunny in this clever tribute to the aging process.
Shirley Serban and friends have captured the very soul of the female, mid-life experience in this hilarious parody of the legendary 1975 hit Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen.
This beautiful cover by Beyoncé & Pearl Jam’s Eddie Vedder will make you feel just a little better about the prospects for humanity.
The condition of PTSD (or C-PTSD) was at one time referred to as being “shell-shocked.” Both terms describe a state of intense and disturbing thoughts or feelings after exposure to trauma, violence, abuse, or threats.
How do we continue to thrive on our own, despite our basic need for social connection? Brené Brown shares her most intimate thoughts.
Have you found that there are certain thoughts or sensations or feelings that keep coming back when you meditate? This thoughtful piece by invites us to consider that those "stuck places" may require a bit of additional attention, a slightly different approach than we'd use with the usual "train of thoughts". Even if you're a beginner in the realm of meditation, this short piece is worth the detour.
"Prepare to be calmed. It begins with a small bell, a set of tiny wind chimes and a plucked, angelic zither sounding much like a harp. As I watched, I could feel my breath letting go; my muscles were less tense. Then Laraaji began to laugh. I smiled. (His laugh is infectious).
For a dose of colorful beauty and hope, watch the Black Pumas sing their song "Colors" at the Biden/Harris Inauguration, January 2021.
In a time when we deeply need to connect to one another, we hold Joe Cocker's beautiful and powerful rendition of the Lennon & McCartney classic With A Little Help From My Friends close to our hearts.
"Be gentle with your healing, be unapologetic with your rest, be considerate of your energy and give yourself grace in the process." Let Josefina H. Sanders guide you through self-love and compassion through her simple yet powerful words of wisdom. From one healing individual to another.
Relax and watch the sun rise on one of the most climbed mountains in the world—Mt. Monadnock in Southern New Hampshire.
Melissa Etheridge recorded this concert in her home studio on June 20 of 2020. The main goal of doing the concert, entitled "Heal Me," she explains, was just that — to further the healing process after her devastating loss. Tune in for a moving performance and some meaningful talk in between songs about what families go through.
Need a blast of Love, Light, Beauty, Generosity, and Hope? Tune in to this 15-minute show from the celebrated Tiny Desk Concerts (NPR.org). Alicia Keys and her crew are the inspirational and fun-to-watch flavor of the day. Enjoy!!
Just trying to manage on a day-to-day basis, and keeping up my fully virtual job for Allies, was plenty for me during France's shutdown. I got my news from my poly-sci major kid. So when I logged on to newyorktimes.com this morning, I was thrilled to avoid the news by clicking on this absolute jewel. It's America in all its diverse, talented and open-heart glory.
Discover the powerful phrase kyo dake wa . Here are some simple instructions to creating a mantra, just for today.
Annie Highwater offers grounding suggestions for staying sane during crazy times. Who doesn't need help with that?
Caring for the spirit involves making commitments to various parts of ourselves. In this post we examine how play, creativity, spirituality, and letting go can heal and nurture the self.
Editor Isabel Cooney realized that there was a striking parallel between the challenges of the CRAFT method and those of getting your baby to sleep. We fall into enabling behaviors at all stages and walks of life. Take this with a grain of salt of course…
Over 40 million people have watched this 4-minute video. We invite you to take this story as a poignant example of how making one small change can produce profound, wide-spread and lasting change. Organically, and systemically.
Accepting vulnerability and admitting our fears … Asking for help … Letting someone hold us in our darkest moments … Stefan Weiner's song, Fearful Lullaby, speaks of these human needs. What does it mean to embrace vulnerability?
Self-Care has been on my mind, not just because it's an important focus here for Allies in Recovery families. But also because I tend to push Self-Care to the bottom of my to-do list. Which basically translates to: I'm too busy to take care of me. Brodie Welch (who knows a few things about the subject) has whipped up a very important document that we should ALL take a minute to ponder.
Watch this young Arab-American opera singer offer his prayer and vulnerability to total strangers and see what happens. A "community of caring" just might exist, even where we least expect to find it.
Freshly inducted into the Canadian Music Hall of Fame, k.d. lang weaves her magic over a hushed crowd at the Conexus Arts Centre in Regina, Saskatchewan with this haunting performance of Jane Siberry's "The Valley."
The Authors of Beyond Addiction remind us: "Be yourself, but be as willing to change as you want your loved one to be." Have you experienced a ripple effect with your Loved One? Have you seen relief and change in the family dynamic when you have shifted your focus away from their problems and towards improving your own self-care? We'd love to hear from members on this topic.
There is something healing about the place where the ocean meets the sand. In this short video, I encourage you to put down what is heavy, even if just for a few moments. Come stand at the edge of the sea …
Sending more live music your way. This Cesoria Evora concert is here to uplift your spirits – Get Up and Dance!
Growing up as an only child in an alcoholic family was the perfect incubator for an isolated, selfish, self-centered life. My father shared his alcoholism with his mother, and with many family members before her…
Sometimes a performance is about so much more than the actual piece being played. Watch this woman's soul shine through as she performs an original song, Try, and shares her story with the world.
I was never told about the sorrow/
How can you mend a broken heart? /
How can you stop the rain from falling down? /
Please help me mend my broken heart /
And let me live again
X-factor judges praised Brandie Love, a 21-year-old orthodontist assistant, for her sincerity, and the way she allowed the music to "set her free". Incidentally, her voice isn't bad to listen to either!
They opened their home to dozens of young people. Then he learned he could give one more thing: A kidney.
What's the antidote to worry? Where does it show up in your body? How is it connected to love? Can worry ever be helpful? When does worrying cross the line and become destructive, or self-destructive? What does Allies in Recovery have to offer when worrying about your Loved One is taking over your thoughts?
Postlewaite's poem urges us to create a clearing in the "dense forest" of our lives, then "wait there patiently" … I see a real parallel with the work our members do as you are going through our program and integrating the principles of CRAFT into your daily lives.
Fred Astaire said this was "‘the greatest dancing he had ever seen on film". We hope you'll find this to be 5 uplifting minutes of joyful entertainment. Take a tiny break from the heavy stuff and let the joie de vivre of these performers carry you.
I have ultimate admiration for families learning and practicing the CRAFT method with their addicted Loved Ones. To me this song is not only beautiful and harmonious, but also beautifully encompasses the spirit of CRAFT, and the labor of love it requires.
Give yourself the gift of three electrifying, uplifting minutes. Watch this performance by a remarkable choir made up of orphaned former street kids from Africa.
In a recent discussion with AiR Editor Isabel Cooney for the Coming Up for Air podcast, Laurie MacDougall responded to the question: "Why do we have so much resistance to self-care, even though we know it's a good idea?" (sound clip: 1 min 27 sec)
Allies in Recovery collaborator Annie Highwater filmed a short explanation of something she does in her hometown that can have astonishing results. It can even save lives. And it certainly spreads hope around where it's most needed.
An unexpected snow day and a poem by Tess Gallagher remind us that every day brings new choices.
Has negativity or hopelessness become the norm in your life? Wendell Berry's poem "The Peace of Wild Things" reminds us to pause and seek inner peace on a daily basis.
In this short video, a mother speaks about the feelings of shame that paralyzed her and kept her from taking action or even speaking to her friends, during her son's addiction to painkillers.
Earthing feels similar to those unexpected moments when you find yourself running through the rain and stop, hold your hands up to the sky and allow yourself to feel heaven rain down. Healing. Freeing. Alive.
Explore the mysterious ruins of Madame Sherri's castle, tucked away in a quiet corner of Southwest New Hampshire.
How well can you separate the illness of addiction from the person you love? Can you find the light of their humanity when their shadow side is staring you in the face? What if you could shift your catastrophic thinking? Could compassion change the destructive dynamic in your relationship?
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