Membership is FREE for families & individuals during the COVID-19 crisis

Learn About the Antidotes to Shame

Shame Addiction Intervention Allies in RecoveryIllustration © Eleonor Davis

Shame is So Dangerous It Requires an Antidote

In our last post, Why Shame is Not Your Friend, we talked about how shame, the intensely painful feeling that we are unworthy of love and belonging, can fuel addiction and also hold us back as the parent, spouse, friend, or child of someone with an addiction problem.

Last time, we invited you to contemplate shame and the impact it may be having on your life and the life of your loved one. You may have taken some time to write down the situations that trigger shame for you personally, and how you feel and react when you are in the midst of a shame spiral.

Dr. Brené Brown Gives Us the Keys to Combatting Shame

In this next video, shame and vulnerability researcher Brené Brown shares the number one antidote to shame and talks about three things you can do to break the spiral:

1.  Talking to yourself like you talk to someone you love

2.  Reaching out to someone you trust

3.  Telling your story









Thinking About What You Will Do to Eradicate this Destructive Emotion

After watching the video, get a pen & paper or your private journal, and consider how you can implement Brown’s suggestions in your own life.

  • What negative things do you tell yourself that you would never say to someone else?
  • Is there someone – a friend, family member, therapist, spiritual guide or religious figure – you can trust and talk to when you are in the midst of a shame spiral? Someone who will have empathy and not judge or gossip? Write down the names of those you trust and can turn to.
  • The next time you find yourself suffering from shame, what positive steps can you take to alleviate the suffering? Will you call, email, or visit one of the people on your list? What are some of the ways you can have empathy for yourself? Can you take a hot bath, go for a walk, or treat yourself to a walk or massage? Record your ideas so that you can refer back to them.

Join our Member Site today to take full advantage of Allies in Recovery’s program, including 8 video modules, three blogs, and dialogue with experts in the field of treatment and recovery. Learn more here.

About the Author - Michelle Aldredge

About the Author - Michelle Aldredge

Michelle is a writer, photographer, consultant, and the founding editor of Gwarlingo, a popular online arts and culture website. In addition to producing web and video content for AiR, Michelle provides creative inspiration through the Sanctuary, a unique section of the AiR member site that features music, video, photography, writing, and other restorative posts.

Which membership plan is right for you?

Generic selectors
Exact matches only
Search in title
Search in content
Search in posts
Search in pages


Join Our Family


Free Bonus Lessons


Join for $39 a year & get 3 Free Bonus Lessons

Get a Sample Learning Module for Free

Sample our program for families! We'd be happy to send you the Module 5 Video & eBook for free.

You should receive the Learning Module shortly.


** If you use Gmail, check the "Promotions" tab of your inbox, where your free gift may land.

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This